In a surprise move this morning, Apple, Inc., CEO Steve Jobs took over televisions worldwide – interrupting beloved game shows and soap operas – to reveal the company’s long-rumored netbook entry. Jobs introduced Greg Joswiak, Vice President of iPhone and iPod Marketing, to detail the new product, “A revolution never before seen.”
With a silly grin on his face, Joswiak discussed the device’s 7-inch monochrome LCD display with Multi-Touch™ technology and slide-out back-lit keyboard encased in green translucent polycarbonate. The device weighs 2.7 pounds and is said to run on Intel’s new Light Peak™ processors.
Breaking with long-standing Apple naming conventions, the new device is called eMate 2550. Joswiak explained, “We wanted to resurrect the Newton family. With so many Newton freaks still around, we should sell millions!”
Joswiak demonstrated the eMate’s built-in word processor and solitaire game. He also showed iTunes and blew the single two-bit speaker with a Grandmaster Flash sample. Joswiak noted the device has cellular features, but does not include wi-fi.
Battery life is expected to be 15 hours for word processing, 5 hours for music, and one hour for listening to music while typing and “talking to your mother at the same time.” The cellular side is again an exclusive tie-in, this time to Alltel. When reminded that Verizon bought Alltel, he said, “Well, that may delay things. They didn’t want iPhone, so we don’t want them.”
Jobs’ face was a dark shade of red as he rushed out of the room dragging senior VPs Phil Schiller and Scott Forstall behind him. Smiling, Joswiak stated, “No worries. They’re just getting back to work.” On his way off the stage, Joswiak chuckled and said the limited initial quantities of the eMate were immediately available “somewhere down the hall – if Steve doesn’t find them first.”
